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OMG!! [24 Sep 2005|08:52pm]
[ mood | happy ]


so I realize that I am a drama queen with too much time on her hands.

I had a lot fun in the mall with Lupe.

I bought this adorable heart clip thingy, and it was expensive, but yeah.

So fucking cute. ♥

I had an okay time, and it's okay that I'm home so early.


(we gots ta keep it gangsta)

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uhohh. [24 Sep 2005|05:01pm]
[ mood | moody ]

i think i need new friends.

or just a friend for that matter.

maybe even someone to like.

nancy called not so long ago, and i told her to call me back. --it made me happy, but nervous.

why does she keep hanging around?.. why does she still ask me stuff like

are you seeing anyone?.. when my answer is always no.

Why the hell does she think that I lie and am talking/seeing people.

She knows I'm not over Jessica.

But never brings it up. Just yup's me when I say

"I have to get over Jessica.."

I have to.

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[24 Sep 2005|11:27am]
[ mood | disappointed ]

I am getting sick. I know it.

And I know whose fault it is.

LUPE!! >:[

I shouldn't have shared that cigarette with her.

Or got in the car with her. I should have just avoided her until she got better.

haha. I'm fucking evil.

It's just that when I get sick, I get real sick and want to die because I can't stand it.

I get real bad cough attacks, phlegm (ew!) and want someone to love me, and no one does, so it makes me worse.


I pity those who are in my life.

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[23 Sep 2005|04:49pm]
[ mood | lazy ]

you ever walk around your room and notice that it seems as if a tornado was in there?...

that just happened to me right now.

2 comments|post comment

eres lo que quiero mas en el mundo. eso eres. [23 Sep 2005|11:53am]
[ mood | dorky ]

i want a person to play dirty scrabble with. --it's fun.

2 comments|post comment

i close my eyes, i think about me... [22 Sep 2005|06:27pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

so everything is getting lonely, and I will become my own best friend.

I will get coffee (even though I don't really like it, perhaps I can replace coffee with a mocha blast?!!)

And I will get the paper, have my own conversations..

(shouldn't be very hard since I talk to myself a little too much..)

With the sidewalk and the pigeons and my window reflection..

The Mask I polish in the evening, by the morning looks like shit.

(it really does..)

3 comments|post comment

i love rain. [20 Sep 2005|11:05am]
[ mood | happy ]

it's raining!

fuck yes!!

something good is going to happen today.

i'll either find my soul mate or finally just..die.

i'm happy + sad, weird feeling, but okay!!

it's raining!! Yay!!

let's dance in it and forget that i ever loved or hated you.

Oh Melissa, you're a fool.

9 comments|post comment

"Meli Meli Meli Meliiii," Kailen [19 Sep 2005|02:51pm]
[ mood | pissed off ]

School went by fast today (that is a wonderful, wonderful thing!)..I came home, cleaned my fishes bowl/tank thing, and he seems real happy swimming around. He is the cutest little fish man. He will swim up when he sees the bottle of food. And sometimes, I leave my finger with the little pebble of food dangling up there, and he will jump up and try to get it. --Yeah, I have a fattie fish. <3 :]

I washed my sheets, because it's starting to get cold, and I wanted to put those fall colors sheets on my bed, but they hadn't been used in so long, so they smelled like closet. Anyway. This post is so useless!!

But I am bored, and I want to post, so yeah...bare with me a few more minutes and or seconds (depending on how fast of a reader you are..) :o)

Liz came over with Kailen and my god! She is so big now! She can almost say a whole sentence! *tear*

This picture is kind of old, but yeah.

awwCollapse )

So we went to the park, and I was trying to make Kailen go down the slide, but I think she was scared, because she didn't want to. That was fun, but tiring. I realized today that Liz shouldn't have kids anytime soon. She really shouldn't. Neither should I, but geez. She doesn't take care of her! I bought that adorable brat an ice cream, and chips. And I took my bubble machine for her, so there was pretty soap bubbles flying all over the park. ♥

So after chasing Kailen all over the park to clean her face up from all the sand + ice cream, we came home, and I really think my brother (the one I dislike) did something to my parrot Scratchy. I swear man, the cage door was all messed up, and his cup of water, was on the other side of the cage, there is no way this bird could have picked up the bowl...I could have gone without suspecting my brother, but the door was messed up. And I know my bird screams real loud sometimes, and he gets fucking annoying as hell...all you do is cover him up with a blanket and he will shut up after a few minutes.

But you see, my brother is an asshole. A selfish asshole. My Dad came over yesterday, and he told my Dad that he's starving, and that my Mom never cooks for him. Okay, he wants some royal treatment or something?!! hahaha. He must be out of his fucking mind, or just really stupid!! He doesn'ttt

*Okay, I was interrupted by screaming and slamming doors*

You see what I mean guys?!! Fuck man. I want him out of here! He just got into this big ass fight with my Mom. You see, my Mom, she will talk shit to you, if you don't do anything. She gets on my ass if I don't wash dishes, etc. And she saw that he was just laying down on the couch, and asked if he was sleeping all day, and he fucking lost it. I fucking hate him. Omg.

So yeah, he wants us to be like

Yeah, Bobby, it's alright that you have kids, and you don't do shit! Yeah, it's okay that you do drugs! Yeah, you want more money to piss away?!! Here you go buddy! *smiles* Yeah...you never clean, it's alright. Who doesn't want to live in filth?!! Oh yeah, don't worry about spilling ketchup on the floor...we, your slaves, will do whatever you want...yeah, we don't care that you hang out with gang members...we think it would be so fucking cool if someone came and shot up our house, thinking it's you! Oh my god, yeah! We'd have something to talk about! Yeah, we want to prove to the world that we ARE losers!! Let's become another fucking statistic. Why want to better yourself? We all know that's a lie...let's just keep on getting high and forget about everything. Yeah, your kids had to learn that life isn't fair sometimes at an early, age...but fuck it, it will make them smarter in the end, no?

I wish my Dad weren't such an idiot and open his fucking eyes. We're not the bad guys, here. He's always like they don't want me here...that's so messed up! My own family... Oh boo-hoo. Spare it, asshole. Seriously, I never understood how people could do that to relatives, until I saw Liz's brother, and when mine moved back in. No wonder his girlfriend fucking left him.

I have sand in my shoes.

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Mil gracias Lourdes, por esta linda cancion <3 [19 Sep 2005|07:47am]
[ mood | blah ]

I really don't want to go to school today.

I want to stay in bed all day and read.

I am also annoyed with my best friend. --worst thing is she doesn't even know.

or probably doesn't even care since her boyfriend is out of jail now.

2 comments|post comment

hehe. [18 Sep 2005|03:19am]
[ mood | silly ]


I miss you, Ernesto. <3

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like oh my gawd. i am so totally cool. [17 Sep 2005|06:53pm]
[ mood | good ]

I was roaming myspace, and some girl had this up on her page

He take my brethe away

Okay, if that was spelled correctly, it would have been sweet and everything.

I guess I am a bitch or something, but when I see someone post something up like that, I want to tell them to spell it right. please. I mispell things too, we all make mistakes, but something like that really annoys me. It gets under my skin.

Or people who type like this:

o My GaWd! U r SoOo FuNnY!! tYpInG lIkE dIs Is SoO kOoL wHo CaReS iF iT tAkEs fOrEvEr!! LoLz.

wat iz ^? --why can't they just type the whole thing out?

anyway. I have to get going...


13 comments|post comment

Sometimes [17 Sep 2005|12:33pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Mothers are experts at making you feel ugly and stupid.

1 comment|post comment

move out already... [16 Sep 2005|04:56pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

i am really fucking tired of my brother.

i wish he would move out already.

he was eating cornflakes yesterday, and he fell asleep or whatever, and he spilled it on the floor!

Did he pick it up? NO. He probably picked up the big pieces, but not the little chunks...they are stuck on the floor. I just realized right now because i'm hardly in the living room, only to mop and sweep.

And he didn't even clean off those tv trays things that we have, so now there is cereal stuck on it.

I tried taking it off right now, but my fingers started to hurt.

And just now, as I was going to mop, he went outside, and my since my brother is a drug addict loser, he comes in and out of the house all the time, so I asked if he would be coming back in the house, and he told me he was with a real shitty attitude.

he never cleans, he doesn't care that i mop the floor. he will come back in the house and leave his muddy footprints on the floor. he thinks he washes a dish by rinsing it with water.

I'm so pissed off man.

He should have stayed in Vegas or Mexico, or anywhere but here.

He is a loser. and I hate him these days.

Oh yeah, he was real mean to me when I was a little girl too. --He used to tell me that no one ever love me, etc.

really fucked up my self-esteem as a kid. yeah, no one loves him anyway.

i'm so mad!!

tips on how not to piss off the only person who cleans the house:

1. when someone is mopping, please do not walk on the wet floor, only if it's a real emergency.
2. when someone just finishes mopping, wipe your feet outside, do not get it dirty in 30 minutes.
3. when someone is washing the dishes, do not bring plates from your room and hand them the dishes smiling.
4. when someone is dusting, cleaning or whatever, don't tell them you didn't clean that right..
5. when someone cleans the stove, be careful when you cook something, try not to get it dirty, and if you do get it dirty, wipe it off!
6. do not hide pots that are dirty.
7. after you finish drinking milk, at least put water in the cup so it wont get stuck in the bottom and make it a bitch for the person to take it off.
8. don't fucking wet the toilet seat cover with piss.
9. don't go into another person's room and take things out without putting them back in.
10. don't eat in my bed. --only i can do that.

--those were the only ones i could think of.

3 comments|post comment

[15 Sep 2005|06:51pm]
my parents got married in this church called San Francisco, and everytime I pass by it, I try to see my parents standing at the top of those stairs...my mom in a white dress, and my dad with his wavy hair falling over his eyes..smiling and waving at our family and friends and feeling like it was the happiest day of their lives.

i could never see it.
5 comments|post comment

mi español es horrible. [15 Sep 2005|06:13pm]
estoy triste.

no se porque.

quiesera verte

y besar tus labios.

maybe i'll feel something.

maybe i'll feel nothing.

El Presidente de los Estados Unidos, es un pendejo.
2 comments|post comment

[12 Sep 2005|03:36pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

take another little piece of my heart now baby...

break another little bit of my heart now, darling, yeah yeah yeah.

Have a, have another little piece of my heart now, daddy.

You know you got, if it makes you feel good. ♥

2 comments|post comment

i'll be a real good friend. [09 Sep 2005|01:04pm]
[ mood | content ]

Bobby's girlfriend had a little girl.

her name is Esmeralda. (I think)


2 comments|post comment

---sigh--- [06 Sep 2005|09:28pm]
[ mood | a little bummed out. ]

i had a horrible fucking day.

4 comments|post comment

hey, take me away asshole. [03 Sep 2005|09:58am]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Ernie came by in his truck yesterday, and I opened the door and jumped in and told him to take me away.

Let's go!! he said.

I thought I might die because I really wanted to, but wouldn't be able to.

My best friend and niece were in the living room eating and some Jehovah's were waiting for me.

I will remind him of this, and he will have to take me away when everything sucks.

And we'll get drunk, fight about what music we should put on, decide on flashbacks, and talk about how fucking depressed we are, and whose the bigger loser.

But I wont do it, unless Becky is there. ♥

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[03 Sep 2005|09:47am]
Lupe took a picture of my boobs without me realizing. --they actually looked nice, and I would post it up, but I was so angry at the time that I made her erase it. So yeah.

I was sticking my head out of the car and screaming Free Tupac...Free Tupac because Liz was listening to Americaz Most Wanted (an old song by Snoop Doggy Dog and Tupac..) And really, I just like to sound insane.

So I screamed FREE TUPAC! FREE TUPAC! HE IS ALIVE!! ITS BUSH'S FAULT MAN!! FREE TUPAC!!! JESUS LOVES YOU!! --crazy and stupid shit like that. I also scream like a girl when I see guys because it's fun.

I'm fun sometimes.
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